Just like any man, I was stunned when my biopsy came back positive for prostate cancer a few years back. After the initial shock, I began researching and discovering my options. Cindie and I quickly concluded there simply were not any really good options. Some were better than others, though, and we chose the ones that seemed best for my situation.
Almost one year after treatment for prostate cancer, I still found myself waiting for the sexual recovery part to happen. After a successful removal of my prostate, my focus quickly shifted from basic survival to restoration of life in general, including sexual activity. My wife, Cindie, felt like she was running out of patience with the current situation.
Frustrations & Breakthroughs After Prostate Cancer
As a married couple, our sex life had changed dramatically due to prostate disease, and the current trend didn’t look as positive as we had anticipated before treatment. Our sex life wasn’t improving, despite my urologist’s positive outlook that the situation would get better with time. We discussed every treatment known to Western medicine. With the support of my urologist, we tried the ones most appropriate to my situation, with minimal results. My frustration level grew with the passing months and so did Cindie’s.
Our breakthrough came over a series of months when I began working with Cindie to apply my business consulting background to better understand and solve this very personal problem. I initially considered it to be a physical problem, resulting from prostate cancer treatment, but now wasn’t so sure. Was there more to it than just a physical problem?
My first realization surprised me: we hadn’t identified the real problem. The core problem was that we weren’t realizing sexual fulfillment in our lives. That was the real problem, and if we could learn how to live a sexually fulfilled life, even if it looked different than before, the quality of our lives would improve dramatically.
A Deeper Understanding of Sexual Fulfillment
We quickly focused on the fact that sexual fulfillment was what we both really wanted and that it was much broader, much more intimate than just having traditional sex, as compelling as that can be.
This realization caused me to question whether I had ever achieved a truly intimate relationship at the highest fulfillment levels possible, even before treatment for prostate cancer. I concluded I hadn’t. In reality, even before treatment, our sexual intimacy was on a slippery slope downward. We didn’t have a completely fulfilling sex life. I didn’t have to accept that for the future, but I needed to fully understand and accept the current reality.
Today, Cindie and I are living a healthy, highly sexually fulfilled, intimate life I never really believed was possible – prostate cancer or not. We accomplished this by staying focused on the objective of achieving sexual fulfillment and developing a healing approach that builds upon traditional methods. We now understand that alternative medicine practitioners can offer complimentary services that provide integrative solutions resulting in higher levels of sexual intimacy, leading to a more sexually fulfilling relationship.
Over a period of many months, we engaged the services of a hypnotherapist, a psychologist, a chiropractor, a naturopath and yes, a Tantrika. We did this while still following the recommendations of my urologist. The power of this integrative approach has resulted in us finally living a sexually fulfilled life.